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5.12.2007The Killers - Not QueenI have this deal with Twisted Wife. She takes me to see bands I don't care for and tries to make me a superfan, and I take her to mindblowing awesome RAWK shows. Thus was my deal to go see The Killers at City Market. This show was destined to suck, but, surprisingly, it didn't. We were late and it was the typical frat-boy and Paris-wannabe crowd. So, I figured I'd died somewhere on the way to the show and was now in Hell. Unwittingly, my wife tripped the utra-elite security by being honest and telling the security personnel that the camera-shaped thing in her purse was actually a camera instead of being sneaky and telling them it was drug paraphernalia. So instead of fighting with TW on Mother's Day weekend, I walked thirty blocks back to our car to put away her camera. By the time I got back, TW had found Steph and everything was once again right with the world. Thankfully, I had missed the opening band, Hot Hot Heat. Okay, some of you are saying, "Hold on there! Hot Hot Heat is good and they rocked!" No, they didn't. They're an opening band, which means their sound sucked and they were there as background music while you stood in the 500-person beer line. Finally, The Killers Review A long time ago, TW won some points by taking me to see The White Stripes. I was luke-warm on the Jack White bandwagon, but, after that show, I jumped on head first. So, now I go to see bands I may not like because she was right once... once. Which brings us to The Killers. They are mediocre. They play a bunch of songs that people like because they are played over and over again on the radio until you find yourself singing them. They want to be Queen, but they lack the charisma. That's it. That's my review. It sucks as much as the band that inspired it. That being said, there were two things that made me love this show. One, I heard a guy say to a group of friends (including women that I'm guessing he was trying to impress), "That just happened!" I remember laughing hysterically when Will Ferrell said that. But in this situation, I was frightened to death. I was so scared that I looked to the heavens and prayed that God make this young man sterile. For if he were to have children, the collective IQ would surely drop a few points. And we don't have a few points to give. The second thing I noticed was that a lot of young men were dancing, hugging and carrying on as if The Killers were the best thing they'd ever heard. I leaned over to my wife and asked, "I don't get it, is this band really big in the gay community or with the stoners?" Come to find out, it's a bit of both. And now I understand. So, I learned something, which always gives a band an extra Rock Fingers. 
posted by Jim at 10:14 AM
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