9.30.2007

Arcade Fire at Starlight Theater

It's a very tricky thing, seeing a band that you love twice in the same year. You know that they will play the same songs, leaving some of your favorites out and adding rarities that you've forgotten. The opening act will be different, but overall it will be like the sequel to your favorite movie... not as good as the original.

Regardless, Twisted Wife and I went to the Arcade Fire show at Starlight Theater. All the seats were GA, which gave us a sense of urgency to get to the venue to ensure we had a great view of the band. Anyone who knows TW, knows of the infamous Morrissey concert in Lawrence where she ordered me to buy tickets the second they went on sale because she just knew it would sell out in minutes. Of course, there were still tickets available the night of the show. Well, I got to see that lovely side of TW's personality again Friday night as we were running late to the show only to arrive with plenty of good seats still available.

The opener was LCD Soundsystem, a band I knew nothing about until Friday. They were good. The songs that weren't attempting to cash in on the neo-disco craze, a la The Killers, were amazing. The 13-25 demographic at the show seemed to love them, but if they want to get me as a fan they will stick to their more experimental songs. Another item of note about LCD Soundsystem, they were NOT good looking. This is always a plus for me because it reinforces my belief that the best musicians are not MTV-friendly. Don't get me wrong, I love watching good-looking people on TV. But MTV has single-handedly fucked up the music industry and I feel like a perv when I watch their "reality" shows that exploit teenage girls, which makes them nothing more than Girls Gone Wild light. As for LCD Soundsystem, they are worth checking out.

Arcade Fire: September 28th at Starlight Theater
Granted, I am one of the converted when it comes to Arcade Fire. So, my review will be good. If that's all you wanted to know, stop reading and go away. For the remaining three of you that care about my opinion, here goes.

TW and I flew to Chicago and had a great weekend back in May that included going to see Arcade Fire at The Chicago Theatre. When they announced that they were coming to Starlight Theater, I jumped at the chance to reminisce about my amazing vacation and see this spectacular band again. By no means did they disappoint. This show was every bit as incredible as the show I saw in Chicago... except different.

First, TW and I were joined by one of her closest friends. This isn't bad (I like TW's Twisted Friend), except that I knew going in that they would chat during the show... during songs I like... instead of the opening band... simple show etiquette, people.

Second, Starlight is outdoors. Anyone who knows anything about live music knows that most sound engineers have troubles outside. Arcade Fire's was no different. It wasn't awful and there wasn't a ton of feedback, but it was worse than Chicago.

Finally, the band opted-out of playing songs like Neon Bible and Windowsill. I can't say for sure why, but I would bet it is the conservative politics of the region that stopped Win from singing lines like, "ain't no chance for survival, if the neon Bible is true," or "I don't want to live in America no more." I hope that I'm wrong, but these songs were sorely missed from the set list.

Even though this show would not easily make my Top 3 like the show in Chicago, it would be in my Top 10. Arcade Fire is incredible live and anyone who decided to skip out on this show, and you know who you are, made a huge error in judgement and is officially on the newly adopted Twisted Jim's List of the Musically Stupid.

posted by Jim at 6:57 PM | Comments (1)

9.26.2007

What I Didn't Get for my Birthday

Although I have threatened to sell my kids on eBay, I can't imagine actually doing it. Unfotunately, there are few parents out there dying to make a few thousand off their daughters under the guise of arranged marriages. Only on the Internet, kids, will you find Marry Our Daughter. If she's not old enough to take her chances on The Bachelor or slutty enough to be on Rock of Love, then set a price and sell her to the first Internet predator willing to fork over the cash.

I can hardly wait for this to become the norm for all children, boys or girls. Then, I will know what my kids are really worth and I can threaten them accordingly. "Twisted Son," I'd say, "mow the lawn or I'll sell you to that used-up, 45 year-old, deformed ex-prostitute for $1,000 on buymykidandmakethemyoursexslave.com."

posted by Jim at 6:52 PM | Comments (1)

9.20.2007

Pam is Out, Dennis is In

What happens when you can't get Pamela Anderson to jiggle for Hepatitis awareness? You make an awesome little cartoon with Dennis showing you some things Pam didn't do to get Hepatitis. Okay, maybe she was on that holiday with Dennis.

WHAD: 1st October 2007 - More free videos are here

posted by Jim at 6:14 PM | Comments (0)

9.19.2007

Pirates Unite!

This is a travesty! International Talk Like a Pirate Day? What's next? Make Fun of Technical Directors Day? Just because pirates are, generally, out of sight (or out to sea), that doesn't give us license to call them "silly." These brave men who have shaped our seafaring world deserve more respect than this. Who do you think made it okay for Robert Smith and Johnny Depp to wear eyeliner? Pirates, that's who. Who helped the medical community in its work toward better prosthetic limbs? Pirates, that's who. Who made it okay for Disney to create a family-friendly attraction based on a lifestyle of theft, rape and torture? Pirates, that's who. Who would take a gamble on an unknown outfielder from Puerto Rico named Roberto Clemente? The Pirates, that's who.

Maybe we should all take a moment today and appreciate these brave men instead of saying, "Arrr."

posted by Jim at 5:40 PM | Comments (2)

9.13.2007

Ninja Babies

Holy funny crap! This goes out to all the dad's. Sooner or later your son will take a shot at the old man. It's part of becoming a man. I'm hoping Twisted Son doesn't see this and think he's late.

posted by Jim at 7:04 PM | Comments (0)

9.07.2007

This Week in Twisted Jim History

A lot has gone on in the last week, surgeries, birthdays, terrible restaurants, bar fights and job issues (this last one I'm not at liberty to talk about lest I be dooced, so don't ask).

Twisted Wife had a problem with me posting the aborted alien fetus (or egg sack) picture. She said it was gross and no one would want to look at it. Turns out, everyone wanted to look at it. Over 96% of the traffic to my site visited the alien abortion page. Hell, even my mother looked at it. And almost all of you have either called or emailed to tell me just how gross it is. Guess what, I saw it in person... I know it's disgusting. Moreover, it came out of me! I still think it has my eyes.

We also celebrated TW's birthday last weekend. Some of you guys out there understand that once you are married, the weekend after your wife's birthday is their "birthday weekend." And it lasts the WHOLE weekend. Luckily, TW took it easy on me this year. She only had simple requests that I was glad to fulfill. For instance, she wanted to go out to dinner and to a bar on Saturday. I mean really, how hard is that? Read the review below to find out.

BLUE Review
BLUE is a small restaurant and bar in Old Town Lenexa (that's Kansas for all you readers that don't know where I am). As the "Old" in Old Town Lenexa indicates, this is not the hip and/or trendy part of Kansas City. Instead, it is a string of quaint shops and restaurants by a set of railroad tracks in the best little suburb of KC. That being said, BLUE really wants to be a hip and/or trendy nightclub. Which means either the owner is a moron for choosing its location or he's a moron for thinking people will drive from the hip and/or trendy parts of KC to visit his suburban nightclub. No matter how you slice it, this makes BLUE the funniest comedy club in Kansas City.

The waitress, using the term very loosely, was hilarious. When asked about the food specials her reply was, "We have $2 shots." We were one of only three tables in the entire place and she was overwhelmed. She would go to the farthest part of the bar from her tables just to avoid actually working. The bar owner came by and rubbed up on her a couple of times. So, I guess I know exactly who she's doing to keep her job. I couldn't stop laughing. To be honest, it made it very hard to eat. Of course, the food made it very hard to eat as well. It wasn't good... even by bar food standards.

BAR Review
As you can tell, Old Town Lenexa is so quaint all the bars and restaurants only have one name. The bar TW chose for her birthday adventure was BAR. Living up to its generic name was not a problem for this place. It was small and filled with regulars, or townies as some people call them 'round these parts. Again, I am from Kansas and every now and then I show it. All in all, it was fun. It had all the hole-in-the-wall ammenities you could ask for, pool, NASCAR and Football on the TVs, a jukebox and underage girls getting their drink on with older guys that told them how "mature" they are. I really can't complain. Our group had a great time and were thoroughly entertained. One of the regulars even bought me a beer. And knowing how socially inept I am, this surprised TW.

But then it came time for us to leave. Turns out the bartender likes to drink... a lot. So much, in fact, that he couldn't figure out how to split the bill in half and run two credit cards. And instead of just confessing that he was too inebriated to do his job, he decided it was better to be a beligerent fuck. So, overall my review of BAR is good. BUT don't stay too late, the help can't handle their liquor.

posted by Jim at 6:59 PM | Comments (0)